


Run Away, I'll Understand.

by Seidr



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Education, F/M, Half-bloods (Harry Potter), Hogsmeade, Hogwarts, Hufflepuff, Hufflepuff Harry Potter, HufflepuffxSlytherin, Magic, Magic-Users, Original Character(s), POV Third Person, Purebloods (Harry Potter), School, Slytherin, Slytherin Harry Potter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:15:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25002241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seidr/pseuds/Seidr
Summary: Theodora Gray has always been a fixer of people but has she discovered a challenge she is ill-equiped to cure in the mysterious Rowen Reinhart?
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

The day began with pale sunlight streaming through the long, large windows of the Great Hall. Students were talking loudly and eating the giant array of breakfast foods.

Scrambled eggs, french toast, fruit juices and much more, took up nearly the entire length of the massive house tables.

Owls fluttered overhead, dropping packages and letters of various sizes onto the tables and into the hands of their rightful owner's.

Theo, or Theodora, as her father called her, was happily biting into her toast as she read the latest book her father had sent her.

Books were the one thing Theo and her father had in common. As a muggle born, he didn't have much to relate with his magical daughter. They bonded over books and photography. She was known to carry around her old Canon Rangefinder.

Brushing the crumbs off her burnt orange jumper, Theo stood up, smoothed out her tweed skirt, which danced below her knees and above her brown oxford slip ons. She was determined to get some good shot on her father's old camera to send him over the weekend. He was always so amazed when they moved, despite having seen such magic countless times. 

Theo pulled her light brown hair up into a ponytail, it swayed as she walked and her bangs swept across her dark eyebrows and above her honey brown eyes. The sun shining into the courtyard from above highlighted the auburn undertones of her thick amber hair.

She perfectly embodied her house of Hufflepuff with her tones of yellows and browns. She was very proud of the house she was in. Kindness and loyalty was valued above all to her.

Holding up her camera, she scanned the courtyard. Her eyes fell upon a dark haired boy sitting moodily and mysteriously alone, in a corner with a book in his face. 

This boy she knew all too well. Or at least heard of all too much. Rowen was his name and he was as handsome as he was rude. He had dark green, piercing eyes. They seemed to judge anyone and everyone they came in begrudging contact with. His thick dark brows only adding to the effect.

His hair was extremely dark in contrast to his fair skin, making him all the more threatening. 

He always seemed haughty and emotionally unavailable. Despite all this, he intrigued Theo, as someone who felt the insistent need to fix or help people, despite their unwillingness to surrender to it. There was something she did not recognize behind the mask of hatred in those eyes.

Although he intimidated her a great deal and she had yet to build the courage to take on such a case. Never has she failed to make friends or at least acquaintances with those others would not dare attempt to engage with or those no one had noticed.

She snapped a picture, forgetting how loud and bright these old muggle cameras are. Her freckled face turned the color of the Gryffindor banner in the Great Hall as he looked up, his face all but kind.

"What are you doing?" He snapped, shutting his book with a loud thud and standing from the stone bench he had been occupying. 

Theo stammered, "I, uh… There was a squirrel behind you." She lied terribly. His expression darkened as he was not amused. 

He growled and swept away, leaving her embarrassed beyond hope of moving. At least 2 people were staring and she really wished she had an invisibility cloak about now.

Theo's day had not gotten better. The story of the incident had warped and changed so much, she felt as though she was now third party to it.

She had about enough by time for supper. She dashed over to the Slytherin table, her heart pounding in fear and determination.

The dark haired boy came into view, alone and scowling at his dinner. Even to inanimate object, his gaze was disheartening.

She tapped his shoulder, unknowingly to even herself, holding her breath. "Excuse me. I'm sorry I took your picture but it was a perfect moment that was beautiful to capture so if you have a problem, I will give you the film but it was art." She defended strongly.

He blinked at her with no readable emotion. He had gotten quite good at that over his childhood. "Fine." He simply answered.

"Fine?" Theo asked, confused more than before. "Fine what?" She asked, drawing back her hand from his shoulder.

He blinked at her as if she were lacking intelligence. "Fine. Keep it." He turned back to the table, unable and unwilling to argue with some happy-go-lucky Hufflepuff girl.

She blinked at him, annoyed at his nonchalant demeanor despite the apparent havoc her prior behavior had seemed to cause.

"Just to be clear, you made a scene for what reason, if you don't seem to care now?" She didn't consider the fact that she had taken him off guard maybe even embarrased him. He didn't like attention and he got it too often already, no matter how uncomfortable it made him. 

It bothered her to no end that she could not decipher this mystery boy's emotion. Theo was known for her empath abilities. This only intrigued her more.

A shadow crossed Rowen's dark green eyes and he contemplated simply ignoring her. This did not seem an option, in his brief experience of her. 

He sighed. "Do you want me to apologize? I will not. Now it seems you have people on that side of the Great Hall that would appreciate your company, unlike myself." Rowen turned back to his dinner, feeling her disbelieving gaze on his back and choosing to ignore it.

He heard her groan in annoyance and her soft footsteps receed. 

****

"There's something up with him!" Theo argued, throwing her hands up in her frustration. 

Her ginger cat, Apollo blinked slowly at her in response. The girls dormitory was empty and her groan echoed through the room.

"Thanks for the input, Apollo." She sighed. Theo hadn't been able to shake this rude boy from her mind since their encounter. Once she had been forced to communicate, she couldnt give up the challenge. 

She liked to figure people out and help them. There had to be a reason he was so standoffish. Theo loved focusing on other's problems so she could then disregard her own.

She went a few days just simply glaring in his direction, during meals and classes they shared. Not necessarily in an ill-mannered way but as if she were trying to decode him. Concentration, with maybe a little dash of general irritation. 

They shared History of Magic class this year and she had heard a rumor that Professor Binns was planning to assign groups of two.

When all students happily filed out of the dusty, cobwebbed classroom, she approached the ghost teacher.

"Mr. Binns? I heard you were doing group assignments. I was wondering if I could be partnered with Rowen Reinhart?" She asked nervously but she had to figure him out. It was bothering her greatly.

He blinked. "I suppose. I'll post the partners on the board outside the classroom this evening."

She smiled brightly. "Thanks, professor." Feeling accomplished but slightly shameful, she exited the class.

That evening, all the students had gathered to check the board. She didn't seen Rowen but they were partnered on the paper so she skipped down the hall happily, ready to take on the decoding of this enigmatic boy. 

The next day, Theo went into History of Magic class actually happy to be there. It was usually the most boring of classes at Hogwarts but this class had another lesson. Lessons on deciphering the most mysterious boy in Hogwarts.

She spotted the dark haired mystery in the shaded corner and her heart strangely fluttered. Chalking it up to an eagerness for the challenge, she walked over. 

He didn't bother giving her a mere glance and was already reading the assigned pages. She inaudibly sighed and followed suit.

After a while, she caught herself staring at him. His raven tresses, the way they danced loosely above his thick dark brows. Below them, his dark green eyes like a forest she was unknowingly getting lost in. 

Shaking the thoughts she unwittingly allowed herself to have, she tucked a lock of her own honey brown hair behind her ear. 

This boy would prove to be a fair amount of work. He avoided all personal questions and blocked all advances at casual conversation.

The class seemed to drag even more so than when Professor Binns was speaking in his droning monotone voice due to her class mates elusiveness. 

The next stab at getting to know him, she asked, "So, does your father work at the Ministry?"

This seemed to darken the mood and his patience for her prying was reaching a peak. "Are we going to complete the assignment or gossip the whole class? I prefer the former, if you don't mind." His words were kinder than his tone and Theo questioned her little game. But she could never back down. It wasn't who she was. 

Alas, the only thing that gave her any hope of continuing this quest was a ghost of a smile that tugged on his full lips when she made a joke about how long it took muggles to learn how to make pictures move. 

Though, a half muggle herself, she also felt a tad bitter that that would be the thing to get a smile out of him, even if it was barely visible. Especially knowing most Slytherin's stance of muggles, muggleborns and half bloods.

Nevertheless, she purposely kept him after class by 'accidentally' dropping her books. This was a test and to her surprise, he passed.

The Slytherin boy helped her pick up the spilled books but did so silently and left as soon as all books were accounted for.

Theodora huffed. Was she ever going to get anything out of this boy? And was he even worth the trouble?


	2. The Vanishing Scar

The next day, Theo walked the hall with confidence. She was ready to spend more time with Rowen, for academic reasons, of course. It was like a muggle psychology lesson for her. 

There had to be a reason he was so guarded and she was determined to find out why.

The class began as the students situated in their seats, Professor Binns droning on even at the start of the lesson.

Theo glanced over at Rowen, who had his head down. His locks obeying gravity and flowing downward, toward the desk, hiding his eyes which were reading along.

She wondered if he were actually paying attention. Who could stay focused with this hum like voice ceaselessly speaking with absolutely no fluctuation?

He was always quiet and to himself. She hadn't noticed any distinct friendships with anyone at Hogwarts, now that she thought about it. This saddened her deeply.

To make conversation and to see if he really was paying attention, she asked quietly. "What page is he on?" 

He closed his eyes slowly before glancing over at her. "208." He looked back to the book. She heard him mutter, "This is my assignment partner?" In annoyance. 

Her sadness washed away by her own irritation. No wonder he didn't have any friends. She didn't feel bad for him as much. More pity now.

"Do you have a problem with me or something?" She asked, an edge in her tone.

He didn't know what he was missing, letting people in. Having friends. She was an awesome friend!

He sighed, like her mere presence was inconveniencing him. "I have a problem with your inability to be quiet." 

Theo huffed. "Whatever. I've just been trying to be nice to you considering you have no friends."

He looked over sharply at her, the most pronounced emotion she had ever seen on his fair face. It was a strange combination. A little anger, shock, some hurt?

"Is that what this is supposed to be? You pitying me and thinking I need you as a friend? Please. I don't. I've been just fine the 17 years I haven't known you." He said this in a quiet, cutting tone.

She realized she may have hurt his feelings and said. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that, it wasn't nice." She apologized but did not expect a reply and scooted a little further away, her head in her book. 

He glanced down, feeling regretful for his quick and emotionally guided retort. A few moments went by as he inwardly battled himself. Should he leave it? Apologize?

"I should not have gotten so angry. I apologize." He said softer than she ever heard his tone speak. She nodded in response. Would he prove a case too emotionally disruptive to herself to solve?

Theo didn't talk to him the whole rest of the class. Even when he attempted to make it better, for some strange reason he was still trying to figure out for himself. Why should he care? He doesn't even know her and she had started it. 

Still, for her to be silent, it felt off to him. It was true he didn't have friends but that was his own doing. 

When the clock chimed, Theo immediately got up, stuffing her things into her bag. She really needed some distance from him. She didn't understand why he was so rude. She was just trying to be nice after all.

Rowen contemplated why he desired to make things right. He didn't owe her anything. He had already apologized. 

As he thought, she made a haste escape.

Theo wondered why his retorts stung her so. It wasn't even that rude of him. She guessed it was more an ego thing for her. No one has rejected her friendship before and especially not this hostility. 

***

The rest of the week, she backed up. She was still intrigued by the challenge but she had lost the taste for it, for the time being.

Theo finished the latest book her father had sent and was set to take some photographs around the castle.

Armed with her father's old camera, she walked distractedly through her camera's lens. Through it, she caught the sight of the raven haired boy she was avoiding. He was walking down the stairs that lead to her, head down.

She quickly diverted her aim before his gaze could find her. Opting to walk around the stairs to miss him. 

Theo took a few photos of the paintings on the walls, the moving staircase in the distance and an empty hall occupied only by flickering torches when she felt a tap of her shoulder and spun on the spot, her camera still to her eye.

A chest clothed in dark green came into view, rather close to her camera and she quickly lowered it to look up to the owner of said jumper. 

To her mostly hidden surprise, it was Rowen. "Yes?"

He seemed awkward and out of place without his usual cold demeanor. He ran a hand through his rustled hair and didn't make eye contact.

"I was wondering if you were available to work on our paper, considering we are partners." He reasoned.

Theo nodded. "Uh, yeah. I guess." She didn't sound very enthused and he didn't blame her. He wasn't the warmest person to be around.

"When is a good time for you?" He asked, putting his hands into his trouser pockets.

Theo was having trouble with his sudden politeness. It seemed to make her even more nervous than when he was being rude.

Her blank look and silence prompted him to speak again. "Or I could just write it myself and leave you alone."

"No." Theo answered quickly. "That's not fair. Who do you think I am?" She rolled her eyes. "I'm free now. How is the library?" 

"That's acceptable." Rowen nodded and turned and left in a quick pace. 

***

Theo was mostly nervous but also excited for her meeting outside of class with Rowen. It was her chance to really talk to him without his excuse of their conversation interrupting a class.

She was filled with a renewed sense of purpose as they walked to the library together in collective silence. As they walk, side by side, an unlikely pair, she was more determined than ever to get into that boy's head.

They took a seat at a semi private table with bookshelves and a walkway as their scenery.

Theo took out her book and flipped to the correct page. She dared a glance up and caught his gaze, which he quickly averted.

She pretended she didn't see or that it hadn't affected her. As if no pleasant shiver ran up her spine or that her stomach didn't flip and flutter. 

She cleared her throat after a moment of silence and began jotting down some points they could explore for the essay.

He also wrote down words in silence, peering up ever so often at Theo.

"Have what you got so far?" She asked after a long while of silence. He glanced up and her stomach flopped in strange response.

He read to her what he had written, though she hardly heard a word. She watched how his brows rose and fell with his accentuation and his eyes followed his own writing. 

She didn't seem to notice he had stopped reading and was simply looking her in the eyes, merely 2 feet of oak table between them.

When she looked up, she saw something. Not only a strange, unknown emotion in his eye but a scar she hadn't noticed before, playing on his thick brow. 

She frowned. "What's that?" She asked, reaching out and tracing the scar with her fingertips. 

His soft expression darkened and went blank and he pulled away. "I think that is all for today." He gathered his books and left her even more mysterious than before. 

***

The next day, he was his former hardened self. Speaking shortly and masking his emotions from her. He kept his eyes down and quietly wrote down his own thoughts on the paper, instead of engaging her.  
Curiously, the scar that had restarted this cold stalemate had vanished.

Theo tolerated his behavior for half an hour in the silence of the library before she couldn't take it anymore. 

"What's your problem?" She asked suddenly, an edge of annoyance in her voice. 

Rowen glanced up in his surprise, before returning his gaze to the book in front of him. "I do not know what you're referring." He lied easily, seemingly nonchalant. 

He didn't want to tell her the darkness intertwined in his life or why he had mastered a glamor spell years ago to hide the scars he had received.

He was afraid that she would see the damage and disconnect herself from him. Ironically, he couldn't see that he himself was doing that exact thing. 

Rowen would not admit it but he had begun to grow fond of her, despite his outward standoffishness.

He quite liked talking to someone and her eyes were warm and kind. He had never felt such warmth or at least, couldn't remember a time before when he had. 

Her laugh almost forced a smile from his lips every time he heard it. If only he wasn't who he was, maybe things could have been differently. 

Theo sighed. "Whatever. Every time I think you're getting better, you pull this. Let's just get the paper done." 

At those words, he thought he had done it. Once again pushing away anyone who tried to get near. Even if it was just for a school project.

His stomach ached in regret but he did not argue with her. It was for the best, or so he thought.


	3. Gestures

Theo needed a break from the mystery that is Rowen Reinhart. His ever present angst and ambiguity taking up an unhealthy amount of her attention. She needed to refocus on why she had even begun the task of decoding him. 

It was a weekend for Hogsmeade visits and she was ready to spend some coin and take her mind off of the raven haired boy, as best she could and if only for a while.

'Meow' a soft and almost judgemental meow was heard from her bed. She looked over at her ginger cat and she got ready. "No, I'm not dressing up in case I see Rowen. Where did you even get that?" She rolled her eyes, buttoning up her jeans.

The cat blinked at her, unamused but did not give a retort.

Theo exited the Ravenclaw tower wearing a tight burnt orange jumper, high waisted jeans and black Muggle converse on her feet. Her hair was down and loosely curled at the ends and she wore a touch of plum lipstick.

Wandering Hogsmeade was just the atmosphere for thinking, or rather, trying not to think of the boy that seemed to let no one in. The impossible Slytherin.

It seemed every time she spared a thought in his direction, he himself came into view. Theo pretended not to notice him. She would go back to trying to decipher his damage but for now, she wanted to enjoy window shopping and stocking up on candy.

Alas that did not seem to be Fate's plan. Once again, as she was grabbing some Chocolate Couldrons, he walked through the door. Clad evermore in black, his dark tresses falling where they may over his thick ebony eyebrows.

She took a deep sigh. It had mixed meanings for leaving her lips. He was definitely a sight. If only his attitude reflected his good looks.

Theo was not about to let his presence hinder her candy purchasing and bid her eyes to leave his direction. 

***

Rowen wasn't sure why he felt compelled to follow her. He scorned himself inwardly for his stalking. He didn't know why it was bothering him that she was not talking him and simply ignoring him. 

He reminded himself that she didn't owe him any attention outside of their class assignment and tried to go about his shopping. 

When he entered Honeyduke's and saw her in the corner, the embodiment of Autumn, he made up his mind. 

He approached the brown haired girl with caution. He wasn't sure why his breath was hitching in his throat nor why his heart was hammering his chest.

He tapped her shoulder apprehensively and she turned and met his dark green eyes with her honeyed. He shiver ran up his spine and he thought for words. "I apologize for the other day. I should not have been so cold." 

She blinked at him, confused by his regretfulness. Though she did not allow her bitterness to speak. 

Theo nodded. "I forgive you." She turned back to the candy. She was still a bit put off.

He played with his fingers for a second, still standing awkwardly behind her. He didn't feel any better about their situation, despite her words.

Theo turned fast and nearly tripped over her own feet, not realizing he was still behind her or that he had unconsciously moved closer for that matter.

Unintentionally, she caught her balance by seizing his shoulders which were higher up and more broad than she thought. Her face instantly changed colors and only deepening when she felt his hands on her waist, steadying her further.

Coming to her senses, she pushed away. "I'm sorry." She spoke through her heart beating in her throat, unable to make eye contact in her embarrassment. 

Rowen's fingertips still tingling from the encounter, he collected himself. "You have no need to apologize." He assured.

Theo tried to give a small smile but it looked confused and pained and she scrambled to free herself of the situation. She left the shop without a word or the chocolate couldrons. 

Rowen pushed a hand through his hair wondering what was happening to him. Why was he feeling these things? The stomach aches, the shivers, the accelerated heartbeat? He knew it couldn't be healthy.

He noticed she had left without getting what she came for and frowned, taking them to the counter and walking out of the shop to find her.

She was walking briskly back to the castle. Very briskly. 

Rowen jogged to catch up a bit. "Theodora!" He called, uttering her name aloud for the first time. 

She spun around fast, stopping many feet away from where he had called her name. 

He had never said her name and it sounded more beautiful to her than it ever had before.

She never really liked her full first name, hence way she calls herself Theo instead. Though coming from his lips, she could see why her mother chose it.

He had crossed the space between them in the seconds she was thinking and he held a Honeyduke's bag out to her.

Her brows furrowed to display her confusion.

"You left without getting any chocolate couldrons." He explained.

"You didn't have to do that!" She took the bag he held out to her. "But thank you!"

"Not a problem." He assured, the tiniest tug of his lips as he watched her look into the bag with a smile herself. 

He did that. The feeling of bringing a smile to her face made his stomach hurt in the best way.

The gesture renewed her quest. He DID have a soft side. He was human. She had to know why he tried to pretend he weren't. 

The thought of him showing his soft side to her specifically made her cheeks blush and her heart flutter.

***

The rest of the weekend she thought of seldom else but Rowen. His dark green eyes like a sad forest, his raven hair falling over them to conceal the emotion pouring out. His mystery, of course, most of all.

Why had he been so defensive about one little scar? And why had it disappeared?

The unlikely pair's interaction did not go unnoticed. By the end of the first day back to classes, the school was abuzz with news of the two being seen together at Hogsmeade that weekend.

No one dared ask Rowen about it but Theo got many inquires. All she shot down as being nothing more than their shared essay as cause for their interaction.

No one believed this, of course. There was too much in the way they looked at one another, even if they were both blind to it themselves. 

Theo found Rowen sitting on a stone bench by himself in a quiet corridor, she wondered if she should disturb him or leave him be. 

He was just sitting there, staring into the courtyard. She glanced there herself but there was nothing there to see.

She supposed he was thinking and decided to leave him to it but as she turned to leave, he snapped back to reality and saw her. The object of his deep reflection. 

He fought the smile daring to take over his lips and greeted instead in the coolest voice he could muster, "Hello, Theodora."

She spun around again at the sound of her name spoken, so pleasant from his mouth. Her cheeks deepened and she broke the gaze he held her in.

"Hello." She greeted back and took one step closer.

She wondered if he had heard the accusations of their peers and her embarrassment increased at the thought.

Rowen moved over on the bench and gestured for her to sit.

She apprehensively obliged and after sitting, played with her hands most anxiously.

"How has your day been?" She asked, attempting to fill the awkward silence that accompanied them.

"Better now." He said quietly, kicking himself for speaking it at all. Why would he say that? He blushed in the embarrassment of his frankness.

Theo glanced over at him in surprise and her stomach released hundreds of butterflies that were at the ready upon seeing him.

"I mean, since classes are over." He quickly added, hoping that saved him.

Theo scolded herself for thinking it had anything to do with her and forced a smile as she avoided his direction. "Yeah, of course."

"Did you get to deliver the essay today?" She added, changing the course of the conversation. 

Rowen nodded. "I did."

Theo stood quickly, unable to bear it any longer. "I should head to my dorm for bed." 

He stood also, nodding. "Yes, would you like me to walk you?" He asked, anxious to be in her company longer.

She shook her head rapidly, desperate to put space between them. How did she get this far into it? To actually have developed feeling was not something she had considered happening.

"Please, I insist. It's getting dark and it's on the way to my dormitory anyway." He reasoned.

She nodded. "Sure." Resigned to walking next to him down many empty corridors with only the sound of her heart pounding in her ear between them. 

About halfway there, she pushed her luck with his newly expressed kindness. "Um, I was wondering, you don't have to answer, of course but I was wondering about your scar. Mostly why you are so ashamed to hide it. I have scars too. Everyone does." She held her breath and dared not look at him as they walked.

He sighed. "I don't want you to think any worse of me." He started.

"I don't think ill of you." She admitted, shaking her head.

"Then I have even more to risk." He frowned, dropping his hand he had unconsciously been touching his face with. "It's the volume of scars in which I have and how I acquired them, that I am ashamed of." 

She was contented enough at this to not press it. She felt privileged at all that he entrusted that with her.

Theo gambled an affectionate gesture in his confiding this information, she held her breath as she touched his arm in a consoling manner.

He did not recoil from her touch and closed his eyes briefly to fully feel the emotion she gave him. He couldn't remember a time in his life when he had felt any emotion close to it.

Theo did not see this, for her eyes were glued to the stone floor as they walked. 

He moved his arm and she assumed she had gone too far but she was exceedingly surprised when she felt him take the hand she had not pulled away and interlocked their fingers.

Theo did not know what to say, even if she was able to speak and her heart appeared to have slow to a near stop in her nervousness. What did this mean? Was it simply because he needed support after speaking on a sore subject or was it something more? She dared to hope a tiny bit on the latter. 

Rowen wasn't sure why he had done it. He was compelled to do so and did not regret it as he felt the soft warmth of her hand and the spark of shivers that climbed up his arm and to his heart.

He only worried what she might think about it as she said nothing. But she also did not pull her hand out of his grasp as they walked in silence so he had assurance that he had not offended her.

At the entrance to the Hufflepuff dormatory, they parted ways, still in silence. They both retired to their beds confused as they had ever been before and getting no sleep in consequence of it.


	4. Friend

By the morning, Rowen had convinced himself that the gesture meant nothing and battled himself inwardly to stop giving it a purpose.

He couldn't afford to think about anything but school. He shook the thoughts he dared to allow himself to think last night and tried putting them out of his mind. 

Rowen went down for breakfast and found himself purposely avoiding Theo. He wasn't sure why. Maybe he was scared or embarrassed but whatever the reason, Theo did not take it well.

Theo noticed almost immediately the distance he put between them, physically and mentally. She couldn't say she was surprised but that didn't stop her from being hurt, frustrated or ashamed for letting herself imagine.

She silently glared and seethed for the whole morning before she couldn't take it any longer. 

Theo caught him in the hall alone and her anger seeped out slowly as she approached him.

"What's your problem?" She glared, stopping short a mere foot apart.

He tried to hid his surprise at her tone. He should have known she would not appreciate his disregard. 

Rowen contained all feeling and greeted in fake ignorance. "Oh, hello, Theodora."

"Don't call me that!" She snapped. Her brows furrowed and her jaw clenched. 

He frowned. "Um, your name? I'm sorry." Rowen apologized, reigning in the involuntary will to reach out to her. He thought he was doing well with his emotions but they swelled up inside his stomach the moment he saw her approach and threatened to expose themselves with every look.

She ignored every thought and feeling she thought or felt and asked. "You hold my hand and walk me to my dorm and now you ignore me?" Sounding as unaffected as she could after such an initial introduction. 

Rowen collected the words he almost spilled out and rearranged them to say, in feigned confusion. "The group assignment is over so I didn't think we had anything to say to each other anymore."

She scoffed, feeling like a fool. "I see." Shaking her head, she turned away and briskly fled, tears welling up in her honey brown eyes.

How could she think anything more than that? Since when did she let herself get close to someone with so little indication of their shared feelings? She felt so stupid and angry at herself.

Rowen took a step forward to follow her before stopping. He saw the pools in her eyes fill up and his heart plunged to his feet. 

He had convinced himself she couldn't possibly care. After all, she didn't really give a sign of her feelings before. Or maybe he had just been to blind to see it. And maybe even now he is misreading the situation.

Maybe she doesn't care in the way his thoughts went to after seeing the hurt and sadness at his remark.

He was even more confused than before and as his mind raced, she disappeared from sight.

It was Theo's turn to ignore him. If he really felt that the use of speaking or being around her has exceeded its necessity, she would totally remove herself. As his apparent wish.

Rowen didn't know what to do. He didn't know if talking to her would make it better or make her feel worse or if he should let her be free of his presence on her terms. He wasn't even sure why she was upset.

Had she felt more than she let on? Rowen shook the thought. It was impossible. Who would feel any type of way toward him? Especially one of endearment and even more so from someone so beautiful, happy and bright? 

How could such a someone admire him in his dull darkness? It was self-indulgent of him to let the thought live in his mind for more than a few seconds.

Days went by as Rowen battled his thoughts against each other. He wanted so badly to talk to her. Never should he have distanced himself in the first place.

He had not remembered how dismal his life was before her and he was painfully reminded without her bright smile and playfully challenging behavior. 

On the one hand, he wasn't sure how she felt exactly and he was a little scared to find out and on the other, maybe she was better off without him, even though he wasn't without her. 

Theo kept up appearances of normalcy as if she didn't stupid for thinking they were anything but class partners by the end of it. Like she wasn't consciously forcing herself to not look for him in the crowds.

***

A gloomy weekend morning, Theo walked the grounds. Camera in hand and hoping to forget the raven haired boy who was living in her mind.

She took photos of mushrooms growing in the moss, the trees swaying in the slight breeze, bird conversing on the branches. 

Theo felt at peace, until she caught sight of a familiar yet strange boy not too far off. 

Unfortunately, he caught her presence and advanced.

Theo could think of nothing more than, run. She walked briskly away after catching his eye, forgetting all camera work and escaping to the castle where she hid in the Hufflepuff common room.

She couldn't sleep that night and she was afraid to face him and humiliation the next day.

It was Christmas break so she was relieved to know she wouldn't have to deal with feelings for a few days.

Her father had a business trip so it was her and a few students alone with the castle. Rowen seemed to have gone home for the holiday. 

She played chess, read books, took photos, all while forcing thoughts of him out of her mind.

She felt she was finally freeing herself of her own thoughts and feelings, though that wouldn't last long.

***

Christmas break ended in a blur of cookies, chess and distraction. She saw the students back from holiday break and immediately found herself heading to the Hufflepuff common room.

On the way she, quite literally bumped into Rowen. Much to her horror and dismay. But those emotions shifted went from anger to surprise swiftly after seeing his face.

She stopped in her tracks as she took in his dark green eyes, purple and swollen on the left side, hiding not so well under his raven hair.

Theo frowned, her brows furrowed as she instinctly reached out to him, but her hand drew back as she came to herself.

Of course she cared and longed to know what happened but for her own sake, she pushed the feelings down and asked evenly. "What happened to your face?"

He seemed panicked and covered his face with his hands. "I don't know what you mean." He lied, avoiding her gaze and turning away. 

She pulled his hand away from his face and saw everything he had kept hidden for so long. The scar she knew she had glimpsed in the library, as well as his fresh purple eye.

He had a scar down his right brow, breaking the thickness a little past where his brow arched and a small line of a scar across the bridge of his nose.

Her expression, he could see shock and sadness before something he recognized easily appeared, anger.

"What happened?" She asked, trying to calm the heat in her words. 

He mumbled the spell he had mastered and the purple faded from his eye and the scars disappeared.

"I knew I saw a scar on your eyebrow that time in the library. You've been hiding this the whole time? Why?" She asked, shaking her head.

Rowen sighed. "Because! I didn't want this. Your pity. Anyone's. It's fine. I'm fine!" He insisted.

A scoff escaped her lips. "No, that's not fine. Just talk to me. I don't pity you. I-I care about you!" She rolled her eyes, shrugging her shoulders as she admitted it.

It was his turn to be surprised. "...You care about me?" He asked. "Why?" He sounded like he couldn't really believe anyone could or would care for him and it broke her heart more. 

She finally understood him a lot more. He has never felt affection toward him. He didn't know what to do with it.

Theo sighed heavily. She had trouble expressing her emotions, especially toward him for some reason.

"Because I do! I… I like you." She admitted. When his eyes flashed to hers in surprise, she fearfully clarifed in a slight panic to avoid his reproach, "You're a good friend. A good person."

She glanced away, afraid she had gave herself away and hoped he didn't recoil with her first reply which was more honest, that she liked him.

Rowen nodded sadly. "Yeah…" He said too quietly. Wondering how he could have let himself think she meant anything more. Though he would accept any care or kindness on her part. 

"I'm sorry for being upset about you ignoring me. I just thought we had become friends or something. It kinda hurt to hear you didn't think so." She said, wringing her hands together in her nervousness.

He frowned. "I do feel the same. I like being around you. You are my- my friend." He knew it couldn't be more than that anyway.

Rowen wasn't someone who deserved someone so happy, bright and lovely. But he would take her friendship if that's what he was offered.

Theo smiled lightly, reaching up and touching his cheek where she had seen the discolored swelling. There was a hint of pain in her eyes as she remembered it was there, hiding in shame. 

He felt fire under his skin at her touch and resisted the urge to close his eyes against it.

"I'm sorry that whatever happened to you, happened. It shouldn't have. You don't deserve that. Maybe one day you will feel comfortable telling me but I won't push you." She spoke softly and a shiver radiated through his body at her words.

He couldn't help but think the touch she trailed down his cheek and the softness in her voice was a little more than friendly but he dared not hope.

Just as he was leaning into her touch, she withdrew her hand. It tingled in a way she was wholly inexperienced with and she wasn't sure why she had thought to do it in the first place.

It stirred up a strange unfamiliar electric feeling which climbed up her arm and down her back.

"I'll let you get back to getting settled again. I'll see you at supper." She half waved as she turned away and left him in his state of fluttery confusion


End file.
